First thing, set the correct goals. You’re touching on it in your last sentence. You’re looking at too big of a picture. Have something easy to find out. For instance, just find out what the best meal she’s ever had was. You’ll spend more time concentrating on asking that and it will make you less … Continue reading i think that i am a pretty interesting guy, and i can actually talk about myself quite well. but i do not. i either do not even start talking, or i lose the conversation within seconds. what is the best thing one can do against approach anxiety? what can one do to convert an approach into a conversation? – reditrator →

First off, thanks! So if you were going to learn another language or sport, you HAVE to devote a certain amount of hours a week in order to keep growing. So, schedule time that you devote just to improving or dating. It will help to motivate you and WILL get you better. So I would … Continue reading Reading through the comments on here I have picked up a lot of tips, so I would like to thank you for those. I am 25, and I work a very professional job with long hours (CPA). I find myself not being able to go out and meet people as easy as I could in my college years (getting off reddit would be a start, am I right??). To add to my problems, I currently live in a small town. What would you say is the best way to get out and meet new people with a busy schedule? Thank you for your time. – FaceofStamos →

Yes, we occasionally hear back from clients and we love it. A lot even come back for refresher courses. Best feedback I can think of recently actually from one of our client’s dads! He was a 23 year old Indian immigrant that had just finished college in the US. He went through our program and … Continue reading Do you ever hear back from people months (or longer) later? Can you give an example of something positive and negative you’ve heard as feedback related to your coaching? Just curious! – Frabjous_Alice →

Hola Alice! It was this guy that I’m pretty sure had undiagnosed Asperger’s. He could not pick up on social cues. Didn’t know that if a person turns away, the conversation is over. Didn’t know how to pick up on conversational triggers. Couldn’t see or understand body language. I could HELP him, but in order … Continue reading Can you describe the most difficult person you’ve coached? – Frabjous_Alice →

Well, chance and chemistry and timing. And you’re right, there isn’t an “out of your league” thing. There might be RIGHTATTHISMOMENT, but then that’s just incentive to better yourself to become someone they would find interesting. I mean, if a high school drop-out wanted to talk to Natalie Portman, she might not think he was … Continue reading I personally think that dating is just a game of chance and that there aren’t really guys ‘out of my league’, just guys I haven’t connected with. What do you think of the ‘out of my league’ thing when it comes to dating? – Philofelinist →

It’s a natural inclination to gravitate towards what is familiar, I’ll give you that. However, most of the time it is only because what we don’t understand can sometimes seem like an unbridgeable gap. So when you talk to people, they might have questions that they are thinking that they don’t know how to ask … Continue reading Ok, I have a question for you- I am a girl (24) and I moved to the states last year. I don’t know why but I feel American men do not like to date foreigners (I am an Indian). What can you say based on your experience- do Americans find Indian girls unattractive? Just curious. – noradavid →

They are a crutch. Sure I’ve used them, and sometime’s they’ve worked. I don’t discount them for the precise reason you say you use them, to get a laugh. However, it’s low hanging fruit. It says to them, “I have nothing else better to offer so I give you this.” I know it’s not true, … Continue reading Hey, thanks for doing an AMA. I’ve got a couple of questions 1) As a guy I’m a big fan of crappy pickup lines, simply for their comedic value so when I’m at parties I like to open up with the line “If I told you a really crappy pickup line would you laugh or walk away?” based off your experience would you say this is a good idea or a bad idea? 2) Having grown up in a small town where exclusive relationships where the norm I’ve never been in a non-exclusive relationship before going into university at the beginning of this year and am kinda lost as to what the etiquette is for them. What are some general do’s and don’ts of such relationships? – trevorswim →

No problem! I really enjoy helping people out with this. It’s a lot like pool/billiards. You just start playing and try and figure out the rules and strategies along the way with no real guidance. Umm, for books, to start with, try the original Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus. It can be … Continue reading Which books would you recommend for a guy in his 20’s to develop better communication with the opposite sex? in terms of dating, meeting for the first time,etc. Thanks for doing this AMA! – vibhuu →

So tough, I know. A lot of guys, before they have a lot of self knowledge are exploring what’s out there. And yes, sometimes, when they hear “exclusive” it CAN sound like a death sentence to them. This is only because they don’t realize that they don’t lose themselves when they get into a relationship. … Continue reading Hi! What would be your best advice to women on taking a relationship from “casual dating” to “exclusive” without coming across like you’re looking for a freakin’ engagement ring. It happened to……..a friend of mine o.0 – Aleera →

Okay, I’ll have to back it up a bit. What makes us anxious? Being in situations that we don’t feel we have control over. The biggest uncontrollable thing there is! And that’s not going to change. My point is, when you are doing something outside your comfort zone, aka growing, it’s going to feel awkward … Continue reading How do I get rid of approach anxiety? What’s an easy way to keep conversation flowing when you first meet a girl? 22 yr old here – GeneralTry →