Hey Bridge, sorry to hear about this. Unfortunately, you’re going to just have to chalk this one up in the “lose” category. But I want to help you to not make the same mistake again. The internet is a wild and woolly place. Everyone is on guard about being catfished or meeting “worthy” people. The … Continue reading A guy and I was having great conversation via an Internet dating site. then I joked and said I was married. but lately told him I was just picking (joking) and when I finally told him I was laid off he stopped texting and will not answer my calls. What should I do? I want to visit him at work and ask why. should I ? ( cause I don’t know where he lives ) – Bridge →

Set small goals. My first goal is to say 2 sentences to a girl/guy. Do that, then you will see how well that goes. You basically can’t fail, so that will engender more trying. Then when that gets easy, raise the bar. Long story short, people think that the worse case scenarios are WAY worse … Continue reading An ongoing theme in dating advice i read online is ‘love yourself first’. What would you say is the best way to build self esteem? – Koffing →

Confidence is the sexiest thing in the world! I have seen this over and over and over. You SordidCanary, need to not feel uncomfortable about it. Easier said than done, I know. But your thoughts on the last statement are categorically false, in the nicest way possible. Short, balding, fat, not classically attractive guy marries … Continue reading (College age here) I’m short and a bit chubby. Because of this I find that a lot of times I go into interactions with girls (at least when it’s not a party or something) in a less than confident manner or I am afraid to make forward moves (like asking them on a date and such). What do you say to someone in my position? One other thing, I saw earlier you said that you don’t believe leagues exist, but I sort of believe they do based on the fact that you rarely see extremely attractive women with mediocre or even unattractive men. – SordidCanary →

Don’t ask the normal questions. Think about your friends. Does where they are from, what they do or where they went to school affect whether or not you like them? No. What does is what makes them, them. But ask open ended questions with positive answers. “When was the last time your boss praised you? … Continue reading I am going on a blind date in two days… 1) What advice can you give for blind dates? 2) What are Classic mistakes newbies make? – Testbot5000 →

Text should be made for little comments or observations, not conversations or making plans. That’s what the phone is for. I know, no body really calls each other anymore. But do you WANT to be like everyone else? No. You want to stand out and demonstrate your leadership. After you get her number you can … Continue reading First of all, thanks for doing this IAMA you’re responses have been really sincere and helpful. I’m a 22 (soon to be 23) year old male and I was wondering if you had tips on texting women. I’m a terrible texter and I don’t pick up on texting cues very easily. I’m also confused as to when and what to text when after I get a girl’s number. Are there cues for when a girl is interested in you sexually or romantically? I sometimes come off as too friendly and I feel like it sometimes leads me to getting friendzoned really early in the game. – kentonlin →

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Do. Not. Neg. It’s horrible to play with woman’s self-esteem. It’s manipulative, crass, and shows your weakness because you have to rely on “tricks.” In one of my responses below, I mention some other books to read to help. I think that you should almost be like a drug for girls. They feel so … Continue reading I red The Game of Neil Strauss and although I thought that most of it was bullshit, I’ve been practicing the methods now for over 2 months and every weekend I got another close with another female. But the main problemis: it is not me. I’m just a sweet guy and not some lame doucebag that negs or is offensive against females. But before I red the book, I was to shy to walk and talk to a girl. The confendence part is true, but does negging etc. realy work on girls? Thanks 🙂 – WhereEaglesHaveBeen →

As undergrad I was acting/scriptwriting. The acting helps with poise, improv and learning how to hear “no” without letting it emotionally affect you. The writing is good because of, well, doing stuff like this. I got my masters for an MBA and I use a lot of business theory like opportunity cost, Six Sigma, data … Continue reading Hey! Awesome post! Do you mind sharing what you specifically studied as an undergraduate/ graduate student? I’m currently pursuing a PhD in Clinical Psychology and was interested in this line of work. Good Idea ? Bad Idea? Thanks so much for your time! – steroidwarrior →

That’s tough dude because school is usually the place that people are social and interact with each other. But one of my best friends did what you were doing. What he did was join the community theatre group. You’ll need to find activities in your town where you can interact with others of your age. … Continue reading So teenager here, and I need a little advice. I currently do online school (homeschool) and am struggling with the fact of my male friends frequently forgetting about me because of me not going to school, and the girls I’m interested in I don’t have any relationship with other than seeing them every now and then. Any advice how to make people remember me and to start a friendship with a girl? – LIVE2KILL →

Sorry (?) to hear you’re dating again. Biggest difference is that when young, being adventurous and spontaneous and energetic is a very attractive trait. Women above 35 really don’t want to to read a profile that makes it seem like the guy has a Peter Pan complex. So many middle aged guys try to sound … Continue reading So what is the major differences in suggesting how a man approach a woman from one who is, oh say 16, to one who is 49. These may or may not match up to the ages when I was/am now dating. OK they do. – JungleSumTimes →

You’re right about race still being an issue. And yeah, most of the stereotypes are BS, but people can be ignorant. So MAKE them see you like any other guy. You’ve had the same upbringing as anybody here. So you may have to share more about what you do that’s “typically American.” She says, “I … Continue reading As an asian male who grew up in America, we have it much harder as men in the dating realm as lots of people assume that we’re not masculine and say some dumb shit about asians having a small dick. I know I’m probably going to get a “boo fucking hoo” reply from some closeted racist prick. Even if someone tells me that I shouldn’t consider race as I’ll for sure be getting those replies as well, race is still a big issue in America. However, I’m not going to really care about those that give negative, deconstructive replies as I have to ask the following so that we can better our dating perspectives. I’d imagine you have plenty of clientele of Asian descent that run into the issues I’ve mentioned. What do you recommend for asian men like myself to overcome these hurdles so we can talk to women, especially on more equal terms as with any other guy has? – inferno229 →